5 Things I Learned While Living With Hyperemesis Gravidarum
Author: Leigha Grimes-Hubbs
This is a Very True Story
Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) is hell. There really is no better way to put it; it’s far worse than your typical morning sickness, which in itself can be pretty awful at times. At its best HG consists of unrelenting vomiting that can generally only be placated by less-than-well tested pharmaceuticals. At its worse, it can be a condition which causes the suffering mother to endure extended hospital stays, esophageal tears, feeding tubes, PICC lines, massive weight loss, and could ultimately result in the loss or voluntary termination of the pregnancy.
A Quick Medical Lesson
According to the HER website (Hyperemesis Education & Research Foundation):
“Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) is a severe form of nausea and vomiting in pregnancy. It is generally described as unrelenting, excessive pregnancy-related nausea and/or vomiting that prevents adequate intake of food and fluids. HG usually extends beyond the first trimester and may resolve by 21 weeks; however, it can last the entire pregnancy in less than half of these women. Complications of vomiting (e.g. gastric ulcers, esophageal bleeding, malnutrition, etc.) may also contribute to and worsen ongoing nausea.
There are numerous theories regarding the etiology of hyperemesis gravidarum. Unfortunately, HG is not completely understood, and conclusive research on its potential cause is rare. New theories and findings emerge every year, substantiating that it is a complex physiological disease likely caused by multiple factors.”
A Bit of Background
During my current pregnancy, which I am presently and very happily at the 30-week mark, I experienced the symptoms of intensely debilitating HG for the first 6 1/2 months. During my first pregnancy I also experienced mild HG through month 7 but, as my physician pointed out, the condition tends to get worse with each pregnancy. This is particularly saddening news for HG sufferers with their hearts set on a large biological family.
While I managed to avoid long hospital stints the first time around, this pregnancy I was not as fortunate. Ultimately, myself, my poor husband and daughters (both born and unborn) endured me vomiting upwards of 30-40 times per day and 3 separate hospital stays in a rather short period of time. Not to mention endless medical tests (blood work, x-rays, GI scopes and more), esophageal holes and bleeding, Zofran pumps, PICC lines, and a total 50-pound weight loss within the first 4 months of pregnancy. This was not exactly the “glowing” pregnant-lady experience many women boast about.
However, I consider myself lucky; some women experience these symptoms all the way up until the day of delivery or worse, their littles ones do not live to see delivery day. For me, during this pregnancy, my HG symptoms naturally ceased at around the 7-month mark. Thanks to a team of doctors willing to try anything to help me through this, I found a medication (Kytril) and a fabulous acupuncturist both of which helped me get back to a medicated version of “normal” at around the 6 1/2 month mark.
During those few months of HG hell, I learned a few things I want to share with women living in the trenches of this illness.
What I Learned…
#1 It’s Not a Punishment
During my first pregnancy I was very young (17 years old) and I rationalized that since I was dumb and irresponsible constant vomiting was my punishment; biology’s way of “teaching me a lesson”. It may sound silly, but when you’re that sick, you try to use any logic possible (no matter how unsubstantiated) to find a reason for it. Fast forward 7 years, after I was happily married and after trying hard to conceive for 18 months, I was fortunate enough to become pregnant with my second daughter, but unfortunate enough as to experience HG again but MUCH worse this time. That’s when I realized HG is not a punishment at all; it’s a documented medical illness that for some reason or another affects 1-3% of pregnant women through no fault of their own. Now I know, there was nothing I could have done or not done to prevent this condition, and if I do choose ever to become pregnant again, I’ll have to expect to experience HG again, because, for me and women like me, pregnancy and HG are inextricably linked.
#2 It’s OK to Be Frightened
Honestly, frightened is an understatement for how I was feeling at the height of my HG experience. When you’re constantly vomiting blood, at risk for heart attack due to low potassium, and losing weight like Tom Hanks in Castaway, things can get downright horrifying. Couple that with endlessly worrying about an unborn baby, a freaked out (but very supportive) husband and a stressed 7-year-old daughter and s**t gets really scary, really quickly. Admittedly, lack of food and lack of sleep played a huge role in my emotional state at the time, but it’s important to recognize that during times like this it’s impossible to be a rock-hard pillar of strength. Being frightened is OK, being an emotional wreck is OK, being unsure of the future is OK, all of these feelings are natural and normal for an HG sufferer to experience.
#3 Doctors Will Treat You Like an Experiment
I was blessed with a marvelous team of doctors who were determined to find something to help ease the symptoms of my HG. But having this team of doctors also meant trying out many, many, many, different treatment plans and options. I was put on every pregnancy “safe” antiemetic drug known to humankind, most of which are reserved for cancer patients experiencing the nauseating effects of chemotherapy. To date during this pregnancy I have been on the following pharmaceuticals:
- Zofran 4mg, 8mg (pill form, IV form, pump form)
- Reglan 5mg, 10mg (pill form, IV form)
- Phenergan 25mg (pill form, IV form, suppository form)
- Myers cocktail (IV form)
- Kytril 1mg (pill form, IV form)
- 1 round of Corticosteroids (IV form)
Obviously, taking a string of different medications during pregnancy is not ideal, and moreover, can at times be unsafe especially when some of these medications, mainly Zofran, are known to cause birth defects.
The reason for all these medications is simple; I had multiple doctors with various treatment approaches, and when one didn’t work we quickly moved on to the next. In the end what worked for me was a single round of steroids, 2x daily Kytril delivered via PICC line and later pill form, weekly acupuncture sessions, and bi-weekly Myers cocktail injections. Yes, that’s a lot of medications for a pregnant lady, and it took months to finally land on a viable treatment plan, and until we did, I was a bit of a guinea pig. But ultimately, all these medications, doctors, and treatments got me and my currently healthy baby girl to the 30-week gestation mark, and for that, I could not be more grateful.
#4 Everyone Has “Treatment” Advice For You
Have you tried eating ice chips? Have you tried taking hot showers? Have you tried smelling lemons? Have you tried acupressure? Have you tried taking Unisom and B6? Have you tried jumping off a roof? (Ok, that last one was never suggested.)
But you get the idea, everyone you talk to about HG will most likely have some form of advice for you on the subject. Naturally, you’ll have probably tried everything in the book and online at this point, and the constant repetition and suggestion of those previously failed methods to ease the HG may be enough to make you scream. But just remember that these people are only trying to help, and yes, while their efforts may ultimately be unsuccessful there may just be that one other woman out there who has gone through the exact same thing you are and what worked for her may just work for you.
So when it comes to unsolicited advice just smile, say “thank you,” pray it works, and then proceed to continue vomiting your brains out. Also, be sure to speak in-depth with your obstetrician before attempting to treat HG symptoms with any supplement or drug recommended by another person.
#5 Cherish the Moments When You Feel Like Yourself Again
When the successful treatment plan my doctors found finally began to work for me and I felt semi-normal again, I couldn’t wipe the slap-happy grin off my face, even when doing the most mundane things. I sat down and had a bowl of cereal and for the first time in months, I enjoyed a meal with my family. I took a shower without needing to have my husband hold me up because I was too weak to stand, I washed my hair (it had basically morphed into one big dreadlock at this point), I read a story with my daughter before bed, I got some work done, I did a little laundry, I watched countless Golden Girls reruns and returned the numerous calls/texts/emails from concerned family and friends that had piled up. I had never in my life been so thankful to be able to do all the things I’d been taking for granted previous to battling HG. This is where the whole “silver lining” thing comes into play because, I’ll admit it, going into this pregnancy I had forgotten to be thankful for all the little things, the simple tasks, and everyday errands that made up my life.
Never again will I let that happen, I will cherish every meal (from salads to snickerdoodles), every Netflix binge-watching session with my husband, every seemingly pointless conversation with family and friends, every day at work, every snuggle with my daughter, because I’ll always remember what it was like not to be able to do those things and how badly I missed them.
Disclaimer: This article is by no means an accurate account of the HG experience for every woman who endures it, just as with any illness and every pregnancy, there are variations. This is also not meant to dramatize the severity of the illness or make light of what can be a life-threatening situation; it is simply a list of lessons I garnered from my experiences. Ultimately, I consider myself a very fortunate woman to be pregnant again and to be granted the opportunity to experience motherhood for the second time.
