Swipe right, swipe left, swipe right, swipe right. Many people who are partaking in our modern dating world have practiced this ritual in the hopes of finding a partner, love interest, or hook-up. At times, the game of swiping on dating apps can seem repetitive, boring, and without passion or romance.
When I frequented Tinder, I would often ask myself, “Where is the love here?” I would go on fruitless dates and then come home feeling as though I had wasted my time. That is, until I found my partner of two years. The moment I met him, I had faith in the online application, swipe right, profile based dating services that we all know and love/hate.
I know that sometimes Tinder, Bumble, OK Cupid, what-have-you, can feel fruitless. But if you follow two easy guidelines, then you can enjoy the apps and potentially meet someone that you will fall in love with.
1. Actually look at their profile
It is no secret that most guys are “swipe right” trigger happy. I once asked my friend how often he swipes right, and he told me that he swipes right on everyone, just hoping that something will stick with some girl and then he will have a shot. The truth is that there are so many more guys on these apps than girls, so a lot of dudes resort to saying yes to everyone.
Ladies, you are more fortunate. Since you have your pick of the litter, take the time to actually look at a guy’s profile and see if they are someone you could see yourself with.
There are a few things I looked for in a profile:
1. High quality, good pictures (this shows that he cares about how he is presenting himself)
2. An articulate, grammatically correct, engaging description of himself (this shows that he is creative and at least semi-intelligent)
3. At least one interest that matches my own (you gotta have something to talk about!)
2. Keep the texting conversation short and sweet
So many people spend too many hours on dating apps having exhausting, long texting conversations before they actually meet up in person. This. Is. A. Waste. Of. Time.
Ask the person some key questions about themself in order to get to know them (What is your favorite thing to do on weekends? Why do you like living in ______? What is your drink of choice?). Make sure they are not yes or no questions, and get a sense for how they communicate. The truth of texting is that you can’t really get to know someone through messages, because they are not looking at you in the eyes and communicating spontaneously.
That is why, after a few questions, if I had a good feeling about someone, I would ask them to grab a beer almost immediately. You can only see someone for who they are when you sit down with them in person and talk. Don’t waste your time, it is precious.